The One That Got Away
by FinchelMoncheleLove
Summary: Real, deep connections like this never go away. Ever. They just get buried. All it takes is a little bit of digging.


**Author's Note: So this is my first FanFiction and I was generally happy with how it came out overall. This is only the Prologue, so it's short. Also, the text written in italics is a flashback. Whenever I write in italics, it will either be a dream or flashback, but they will barely ever happen. I really hope you like it, and remember I'm not a writer so please don't hate me if it's bad, lol. And remember to review if you want me to continue this fic. Thank you so much! Enjoy :) xoxox**

* * *

Friday 18th November 2011. That was a date that Rachel would never forget. The day her whole world came crumbling down.

There was no denying that it had hit her when she'd least expected it. When it had all been going _so well._ When she was at her happiest.

It really had been an amazing time. She felt loved, cared for, wanted. She was having fun with her friends. She was being whoever she wanted to be and she was living each day like it was her last.

She had been foolish, though. Foolish to believe that she was wanted by someone. Foolish to believe that she was loved by anybody other than her dads. It had all seemed too good to be true when she really thought about it. It seemed so surreal. But Rachel was so caught up in her happiness that she didn't even consider the chance of it being false and short-lived. She was just so damn happy, and she didn't want to let go of that feeling. She should have guessed, though, that it was just a matter of time before her ideal life was taken away from her, reminding her of how she felt as she walked down the halls of McKinley every single day; unloved, friendless, alone.

It had been no secret that, since she'd graduated three and a half years ago, Rachel's popularity hadn't rose greatly. She'd failed as a performer because after choking at her NYADA audition, was too scared to pursue a career of fame. The once seemingly very real and inevitable dream had dissolved into nothing but a very distant memory, filled with happiness and hope and optimism.

But her life was amazing, in some respects. She had incredible people in it, and that was enough for her. Sure, there would always be a bit of a hole in her, wondering what could've been, but her friends meant more to her than being a star. She had never admitted it before, but deep down inside, it had always been true.

The most amazing person in her life, though… The one who stood out... That was Finn, her boyfriend.

For the first couple of years after graduation, they were like a two-for-one deal. She loved Finn for everything she had, and she knew he felt the same. They were best friends, lovers, partners in crime, and Rachel knew that as long as she had Finn by her side, everything would be okay. She may not have had Tony's and Oscar's lined up on her shelves, but that didn't matter as much anymore. It was them against the world, and she loved it that way.

If only it had lasted.

"_W-wait... You're... you're breaking up with me?" Rachel asked, exhaling loudly, her heart smashing to a million pieces. He didn't need to say anymore. His face said it all._

"_Finn!" She breathed, a single tear rolling down her cheek. "You… You let me give myself to you…. My heart, my body, my soul… And now you're just dumping it on the side like it doesn't mean anything? Why, Finn? How could you do that to me?" She choked. _

_Finn looked hurt. He looked guiltier than ever, and she was actually starting to feel bad for him, but she still did not hesitate to continue. _

"_I'm sorry, Finn. Please. Don't break up with me. I need you. Whatever I've done, whatever it is, I- I can fix it. I promise you. Please. I love you, and I can't be without you!" She was pleading now, begging, even. She had no doubt that he could see that._

_Finn sighed, and looked pretty messed up. Rachel could see the bags forming under his eyes, and she could tell that he had probably lost sleep making this decision._

"_I'm sorry, Rach. Really, I am. But we both know that this isn't working. Our relationship is unhealthy. We argue over stupid stuff and I just have so much going on in my life right now. I just can't be dealing with it anymore. I'm so sorry." _

_Finn gave Rachel a sad smile as she blinked back tears, refusing to let them fall. She was stronger than this. She was strong enough to fight the need to cry in front of the person she loved most. She wasn't about to make herself even more vulnerable in the situation than she already was. _

"_I- I just don't get it." She sniffed, as even more tears surfaced. "One minute you're taking me out on dates and treating me like a princess… One day y-you're telling me you love me and that you'll never let me go, and now… And now this?" She asked, her voice barely a whisper. Her hands trembled and she couldn't take her eyes off her lap, knowing that if she made eye contact with him, she would just break. And she couldn't handle that. _

"_I know, Rachel. And you know that I will always be here for you, no matter what. But this isn't right. We need to work out how to look after ourselves before we start pursuing relationships. We've been arguing so much recently, our relationship has been on the rocks, you can't deny it. We need to figure out who we are instead of letting our relationship define each other. We've been in the same relationship since high school. We need to find out who we are alone. We're individual's too." _

_Finn took Rachel's hand in his and stroked it softly, tears welling up in his eyes._

"_You know it's true, and as much as it does hurt me to admit it, this is the right thing to do." _

_Rachel didn't buy it though. If it was wrong, if their whole relationship was wrong, then why did it feel so right? Up till now, Rachel had never been surer of anything. She'd never been so certain about anything in her life and though she found it hard to believe, she knew Finn loved her. She really did. And she had never had any doubts about that. Not till now._

_She wanted to shout at him and scream to burn off her anger. She wanted to cry and cry and cry till she had no more tears left in her. She wanted to sit in his lap with his arms wrapped tightly around her, just being close to him, feeling his warmth, which was all she needed. She wanted him to rub her back and stroke her hair as he told her everything was going to be okay. But she didn't. She just sat there, staring at him with the same moon-eyed eyes that had stared at him the first time they ever met. But this time, the happiness was gone. The hope, the spark, the optimism that Rachel Berry was always known for having had disappeared. These eyes were lifeless, and reflected the image of a disheartened, broken girl just wanting to be loved. They were lost. She was lost._

"_Okay." Rachel answered in a small voice, shifting uncomfortably in her chair. She didn't want to fight with Finn. She knew that was the last thing she wanted to do. Even though it hurt, he was the most important person in her life and she wasn't about to lose him it more than one way. It just wasn't worth it. _

_She wanted to fight for their relationship. She wanted to so badly that she could've written a book or even a whole library on why their relationship was worth fighting for. But she couldn't. She knew she couldn't. Having Finn as just a friend was better than not having him at all._

_It sucked. It sucked more than words. They were the only words she could find to describe her situation. She was crushed beyond belief. _

_Finn breathed a sigh of relief, abruptly standing up from the large sofa. Rachel looked up at him with wide eyes and melted under his gaze, but quickly flickered her eyes away to somewhere else. She didn't look at anything in particular; she just couldn't look at him._

"_Thanks, Rachel." He said wholeheartedly, giving one of his adorable half smiles. "You're my best friend and that isn't going anywhere. I didn't want to argue with one of my favourite people."_

_Rachel smiled weakly as she watched him walk out the door, and once he was gone, she finally let her tears flow, curling into a ball, wishing for everything she didn't have. It was never really hers to begin with._

And that's what happened on Friday 18th November 2011. It still haunted her to this day and although she and Finn were still best friends, she wanted more. She would always want more.

She could only hope that one day, he wanted that too.

* * *

**AN: So this is the end of the prologue to my first FanFiction. The next chapter will be 100% focused on the present tense, which is 1-1 and a half years later. I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Next chapter we'll have some dramatic Finchel interaction. Also I'll be introducing some new characters like Quinn, Santana and Kurt. By the end of this fic, all of the (old) New Directions will be in it somehow. Please remember that this fic is A/U, so there will be a lot of differences from the show. As you can see, there have already been two in this chapter (Rachel not getting into NYADA and Finchel not breaking up for a couple of years after graduation). Thanks! Remember to review :).**


End file.
